For years, I struggled with depression and the challenges of staying in shape as a result. Like so many people and mothers (ahem), I found myself prioritizing the needs of others while neglecting my own. While taking care of family and friends brought me joy, I gradually realized that the sacrifices I made in my own physical, emotional, mental, and spiritual health were taking a toll on me. Learning to prioritize my self-care has been one of the hardest, yet most rewarding, journeys of my life.
Depression can feel like a heavy weight – like a wet, wool blanket, trying to smother you as you try to lift yourself. Just getting out of bed on some days can take everything that is within you. Staying physically active or emotionally balanced felt nearly impossible at times. I found myself in cycles of exhaustion and feeling guilty for wanting to focus on myself. But over the years, I’ve learned that self-care isn’t selfish; it’s vital. I've found that I'm a better mom and even a better friend when I take care of myself first and foremost. I'm more patient and understanding, even-tempered, and my decisions are more thought out than impulsive. I sleep better and make better choices in what I eat.
To take care of my health, I started with making (and continue to make) small, manageable changes. I committed to regular exercise, even when it was hard. Even choosing to exercise for ten minutes a day in the beginning will have a huge impact on your mental, emotional, and physical health. Take a walk, stretch when you wake up in the morning and again in the afternoon, or take a class at your local YWCA. Then I chose to begin carving out time for myself, embracing practices like meditation, prayer, and journaling to connect with my inner self and my faith. I set boundaries with others in my life, not to overdo it, leaving time for myself. This was particularly difficult with my children. I had to learn to be okay with disappointing others for the sake of the greater benefits. Spiritual wellness is just as important as physical or mental health, reminding me that I’m on a journey to wholeness.
I've learned that life is about small choices, that when made consistently, can reap great benefits. Now, I understand that taking care of myself first is essential. It enables me to show up fully for others while maintaining balance. My journey isn’t perfect, but I’ve learned that self-care is a daily commitment (sometimes multiple times a day!) – and that I deserve it as much as anyone else!
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